This is why we prefer Motorbikes to Cars

12 Posts | Latest reply on 14/08/2010 07:50:55 by Deleted User | Go to original / last post
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At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the car industry and stated that :- "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 miles to the gallon."

In response to Gates' comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.

3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.

4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn, would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.

5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT". But then you would have to buy more seats.

6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would only work on five percent of the roads.

7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning light.

8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.

9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going off.

10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.

11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.

12. Every time GM introduced a new model car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.

13. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.                                                                                                                                                                              
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Sandi

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  Very amusing LOL and so true.                                                                                                                                                                             
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anneka56

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ROFL    that's brilliant  Clap                                                                                                                                                                               
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whiteairedfox

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really funnyThumbs Up                                                                                                                                                                             
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dunans

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ive got a laguna estate - You do press the "start" button to shut off the engine.

haha very good tho                                                                                                                                                                             
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Deleted Member

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I do like this joke....my friend comes up with these amazing jokes and just sends me them out of the blue! Classic! Especially anything that makes cars look bad!                                                                                                                                                                              
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Nutkin68

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very funny !!!                                                                                                                                                                             
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Deleted Member

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Smile
                                                                                                                                                                             
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Brummie Jackie

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chuckle chuckle                                                                                                                                                                               
DTR30's Profile
DTR30

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Very clever.....must have had the GM guys chuckling away with that response.                                                                                                                                                                              
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Deleted Member

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Let's hope so DTR30! ha-ha                                                                                                                                                                             
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Deleted Member

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Chuckle Chuckle indeed BJ....now lets hear one of your amazing jokes Smile                                                                                                                                                                              


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