The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down     Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear " the rules"
From the female side....     Now here are the rules from the male side.    
These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!     1.   Men are NOT mind readers.
(FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)   1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports, It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days..


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us..

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the   other one

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle..

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football, Motor racing or Rugby .

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape.   Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.                                                                                                                                                                              

nail on the head Jackie                                                                                                                                                                               

Just for you smokey just for you lol                                                                                                                                                                              

                                                                                                                                                                               

    all so true

Thats cleared quite a few things up!!                                                                                                                                                                              

Absolutely bloody excellent!!! I think #1 just about sums it all up                                                                                                                                                                             

pmsl                                                                                                                                                                              

oh dear                                                                                                                                                                              

truer than a true thing in a true thing competition                                                                                                                                                                             

**'truer than a true thing in a true thing competition'**

this is a true statement, and I like it lol
                                                                                                                                                                             

lmao                                                                                                                                                                              

hahahahahahah                                                                                                                                                                              

BJ  i would be very interested to 'read on' so to speak, prey tell where did you find these 'revelations'                                                                                                                                                                              

Clarissa some one told me them lol

more for your persual .......

Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not considered by us to be opportunities to see if we can find the perfect present again!

Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it
.
If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic
.
Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

Foreign films are best left to foreigners. (Unless it's Bruce Lee or some war flick where it doesn't really matter what they're saying anyway.)

BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

Every man shall allow one empty urinal of separation in a bathroom with three or more urinals

If a woman asks to open a jar, you must open it with ease, to prove your masculinity.

brilliant .............all is now clear  ..............lol                                                                                                                                                                             

BJ - sshhhh   Clarissa doesn't need to know more rules                                                                                                                                                                             

BJ ....thanks for writin us out some more more info = better understanding of 'the species'   Rob .... only tryin to 'improve me education,' surely that can't be a bad thing                                                                                                                                                                              

Sorry Rob .............. but you did eat all the french chocolate !!!!!                                                                                                                                                                              

...and the Spanish