I’m Very Well Thank You
There is nothing the matter with me,
I’m as healthy as I can be
I have arthritis in both knees,
And when I talk – I talk with a wheeze
My pulse is weak, and my blood is thin,
But – I’m awfully well for the shape I’m in
Arch supports I have for my feet,
Or I wouldn’t be able to be out on the street
Sleep is denied me night after night,
But every morning I find I’m alright
My memory is failing, my head’s in a spin
But – I’m awfully well for the shape I’m in
The moral is this – as my tale I unfold,
That for you and me who are getting old
It’s better to say ’I’m fine’ with a grin,
Than to let folk know the shape we are in
How do I know that my youth is all spent?
Well, my ‘get up and go’ has got up and went
But I really don’t mind when I think with a grin,
Of all the grand places my ‘got up’ has bin
Old age is golden I’ve heard it said,
But sometimes I wonder as I get into bed
With my ears in a drawer, my teeth in a cup,
My spec’s on a table until I get up
‘Fore sleep overtakes me I say to myself,
Is there anything else I could lay on the shelf?
When I was young my slippers were red,
I could kick my heels right over my head
When I was older my slippers were blue,
But I could still dance the whole night through
Now I am old my slippers are black,
I walk to the shop and puff my way back
I get up each morning and dust off my wits,
And pick up the paper to read the ‘obit’s’
If my name is still missing I know I’m not dead,
And so I have breakfast – and go back to bed.
Author unknown