Not sure if Im brave or stupid posting this but what the hell and Sandi it's not a joke it's true it so please dont move it lol   MAN RULESAT LAST A GUY HAS TAKEN THE TIME TO WRITE THIS ALL DOWNFINALLY, the guys' side of the story. ( I MUST ADMIT, IT'S PRETTY GOOD.) ... WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE THESE ARE OUR RULES!PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE: SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!JUST SAY IT!1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS. 1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH.IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY. 1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...                                                                                                                                                                             

At last, now maybe we can all move forward and avoid the confusion.
Well done Jp, would have posted it myself if I had found it first.                                                                                                                                                                             

I may live to regret it but it will give XK a rest from the slapping
                                                                                                                                                                             

Brave. Very brave.....or very stupid. good luck with the couch.It did make me laugh though                                                                                                                                                                             

hmmmmm ........   so you admit you had to actually look for that on the internet.... you didnt even know your own rules...........     ..... sounds like a reet mardy  to me hahahahahahaha                                                                                                                                                                             

We already knew the rules suzi, we just needed to find evidence to corroborate it. Just like Moses, Jp has cast them in stone.
Rule #1 is very apt!                                                                                                                                                                             

well i hope your all very happy together...............      in ya sheds / garages sleepin on sofas  and #1.... toilets have a seat adn a lid for a reason... the reason being ya put the lid down on the seat when finished coz it looks nice when you go in the bathroom... not coz its conveient   its all about loooks......... now where is me mauve and peach bath mat............ pmsl                                                                                                                                                                              

And here I was thinking you weren't just another girlie girl. 66 sad now.                                                                                                                                                                             

She rides a sportster so she is a girly girl                                                                                                                                                                              

oiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii   im not a girlie girl,,,,,,,,,, im a schexay biker chiiiiiiiicck .... PMSL     anyhw back to your rules boys........     pmsl                                                                                                                                                                             

JP!!!!!!! Gawd darn it man, Give me five matey, well done, at last a man admitting all mens short comings!!! That is not a pee take, im serious, instead of playing the usual ignorant trick you are admitting that you guys cannot and will never understand us women!!!! Yes we are the sensitive go around 50 roundabouts to cross the road to say what we mean type instead of just saying what we mean or want cos we expect you to know and act as we would!!! 
The problem in my opinion between man and woman is.....Men want women to think and act like men and Women want men to think and act like women, yes we want the hugs and sympathy when we are sad, thats not a mans way of doing things, as is the same when we feel offended by someone and want the man to defend us or even agree that we were offended, instead of saying you dont see the problem!!! 
We are different in so many ways, how we think, how we feel, but, instead of complaining about it why dont we just accept it, hell the world would be a boring place if we all thought and reacted the same way, its about time both sexes stopped complaining about each other and complimented each other, cos, when a man and woman accept the differences and get on with it, between the 2 forces there isnt a more powerful nor wonderful "Perfect Harmony"!!!!!!!!! 

                                                                                                                                                                             

  ahaaaa thats why my life is so god damn easy !!!!    cos i think like a man ha ha ha.  if i want it done i do it myself i dont care if im not a size 10 or if my ass looks big.i dont do blackmail.and i only own about 5 pairs of shoes/boots. i am well sorted.only time i ask russ to do something is if i have got a bolt on the bike thats so tight i cant undo it.i think its cos im so independant and refuse to be beholden to anyone or be a sicky pampered bimbo who cant even find the ignition on her bike without help lmfao                                                                                                                                                                              

The problems encountered by men and women is easily resolved by a very simple tool which I discovered back in the 80's.
It is called an arountooit.
 Deceptively simple in design, it can be employed to do any task at anytime, anywhere.
When asked to do a bit of D.I.Y, I proundly announce,' yes, of course I will do it. I will get arountooit and it will be done in next to no time, Sweetheart.''
The perfect tool that is a must in every mans tool box.                                                                                                                                                                             

ah well this tool arountooit i seem to remember is one that is of little use to anyone     coz it actuallly never gets used........... i bet yours is still brand new aint it 66   pmsl                                                                                                                                                                              

Oh no suzi, mine had been used frequently, especially wheny ex had decorating on herind. Actually, I could do with a new one as it has seen better days.                                                                                                                                                                             

                                                                                                                                                                             

rules, what rules !                                                                                                                                                                             

Lol HR                                                                                                                                                                             

thik the ruels are great ...................................but men dont need instruksons do thay ???                                                                                                                                                                             

I don't do rules .... I have my own approach :)