There's always a few that fall from a cracker that actually make you giggle.. even though they are ridiculously crap! 

What happens if you eat too many Christmas Decorations?
You get tinsilitus!!

and..

Why did the Elves ask the Turkey to join the band..
Cos he had the Drumsticks!!


                                                                                                                                                                             

Jack Daniels Christmas CookiesIngredients:1 cup of waterLemon juice1 tsp baking soda4 large eggs1 cup of sugar1 cup of nuts1 tsp salt2 cups of dried fruit1 cup of brown sugar1 cup Jack Daniels Whiskey1. Sample the Jack Daniels to check quality.2. Take a large bowl, check the Jack Daniels again to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.3. Turn on the electric beater.4. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.5. Add one teaspoon of sugar....6. Beat again. At this point it's best to make sure the Jack Daniels is still okay. Try another cup, just in case.7. Turn off the mixerer thingy.8. Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.9. Pick the frigging fruit off the floor.10. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver. Sample the Jack Daniels for tonsisticity.11. Next, sift two cups of salt, or whatever. Who giveshz a sheet. Check the Jack Daniels.12. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.13. Greash the oven. Turn the cake 360 degrees and try not to fall over. Don't forget to beat off the turner.14. Finally, throw the bowl through the window, finish the Dack Janiels and make sure to put the stove in the dishwasher.                                                                                                                                                                             

What do snowmen eat?

Ice-burgers                                                                                                                                                                               

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9   how do you make a jacket last? make the trousers first   What to you call someone who makes clothes for rabbits a hare dresser   These are really bad cracker jokes                                                                                                                                                                             

What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?             snowballs!                                                                                                                                                                             

why did the chicken cross the road

to get to the other side