Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. They tried and tried to get the door open, but they couldn't. The girl with the coat hanger stopped for a moment to catch her breath, and her friend said anxiously, "Hurry up! It's starting to rain and the top is down."                                                                                                                                                                                              

doh!                                                                                                                                                                             

Blonde Sky DiversA blonde and a brunette are skydiving.The brunette jumps out the plane and pulls the cord -- nothing happens.She pulls the emergency cord and still nothing.The blonde finally jumps out of the plane and yells "Oh! So you wanna race, huh?"                                                                                                                                                                             

                                                                                                                                                                             

Blond medical terminologyArtery -- Study of paintingsBacteria -- Back door of cafeteriaBarium -- What doctors do when treatment failsBowel -- Letter like A.E.I.O.UCaesarean section -- District in RomeCat scan -- Searching for kittyCauterize -- Made eye contact with herColic -- Sheep dogComa -- A punctuation markCongenital -- FriendlyD&C -- Where Washington isDiarrhea -- Journal of daily eventsDilate -- To live longEnema -- Not a friendFester -- QuickerFibula -- A small lieG.I. Series -- Soldiers' ball gameGrippe -- SuitcaseHangnail -- CoathookImpotent -- Distinguished, well knownIntense pain -- Torture in a teepeeLabor pain -- Got hurt at workMedical staff -- Doctor's caneMorbid -- Higher offerNitrate -- Cheaper than day rateNode -- Was aware ofOutpatient -- Person who had faintedPelvis -- Cousin of ElvisPost operative -- Letter carrierProtein -- Favoring young peopleRectum -- It almost killed himRecovery room -- Place to do upholsteryRheumatic -- AmorousScar -- Rolled tobacco leafSecretion -- Hiding anythingSeizure -- Roman emperorSerology -- Study of knighthoodTablet -- Small tableTerminal illness -- Sickness at airportTibia -- Country in North AfricaTumor -- An extra pairUrine -- Opposite of you're outVaricose -- Located nearbyVein -- Conceited                                                                                                                                                                             

LMAS!!!!!!                                                                                                                                                                              

Q: Why do Blondes wear earmuffs?A: To avoid the draft.Q: Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours?A: Because the can said "concentrate" on it.Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?A: Tell her a joke on Wednesday.Q: What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?A: Trying to hold on to a thought.Q: Why don't blondes have elevator jobs?A: They don't know the route. Q: Why do blondes work seven days a week?A: So you don't have to retrain them on Monday.                                                                                                                                                                             

Q: What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer?A: Frosted Flakes.   Can you tell I'm bored?                                                                                                                                                                              

lmao - pick on blondes week is it                                                                                                                                                                              

We're allowed to!                                                                                                                                                                              

A blonde goes into a nearby store and asks a clerk if she can buy the TV in the corner.   The clerk looks at her and says that he doesn't serve blondes, so she goes back home and dyes her hair black.   The next day she returns to the store and asks the same thing, and again, the clerk said he doesn't serve blondes.   Frustrated, the blonde goes home and dyes her hair yet again, to a shade of red.   Sure that a clerk would sell her the TV this time, she returns and asks a different clerk this time.   To her astonishment, this clerk also says that she doesn't serve blondes.   The blonde asks the clerk, "How in the world do you know I am a blonde?"   The clerk looks at her disgustedly and says,"That's not a TV -- it's a microwave!" ====================================================== A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?"   In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something."   Our bartender IS blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is 6'2", weighs 225, and he's a rugby player. The fella to your right is 6'5" pushing 300 and he's a wrestler. Each one of US is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"   The blind guy says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."                                                                                                                                                                             

ooops sorry di  - you can punish me later lol

                                                                                                                                                                             

imoa luv the medical terms one                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

why are blond jokes so short   so that men can remember them   although looking through this lot it may not stand up but then i am blond lmao                                                                                                                                                                                   

Q: What's a blonde's favorite wine? A: "Daddy! can I go to Miami! Q: What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency?A: She turned it over and used the other side. Q: How do you change a blonde's mind?A: Blow in her ear. Q: What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?A: There are some things even a blonde won't do. Q: What did the blonde do when she heard that 90% of accidents occur around the home? A: She moved. Q: Why do blondes look up and smile at lightning?A: They think someone is taking their picture. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a trampoline?A: You take your shoes off before you jump on a trampoline! Q: Why do blondes have square breasts? A: Because they forgot to take the tissues out of the box! Q: What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common? A: You keep hearing about them, but never see any. Q: Why can't blondes count to 70? A: Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful. Q: What is the difference between blondes and traffic signs?A: Some traffic signs say stop. Q: What did the blonde customer say to the waitress when reading her nametag? A: "Mary... that's cute. What did you name the other one?" Q: Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail when she was hammering? A: The noise gave her a headache. Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a 747? A: Not everyone has been in a 747. Q: What do blondes say after sex?A: "Thanks, guys!"                                                                                                                                                                             

There were three dumb blonde girls on an island who found an old pot and started rubbing at it, when suddenly out popped a genie. The genie told them that he only could grant 3 wishes so they would each get one. The first girl asked the genie to make her smarter so she got turned into a red-head.The second girl wanted to be even smarter than the first, so the genie turned her into a brunette.Then the last girl wished to be even smarter than both her friends......so the genie turned her into a MAN.                                                                                                                                                                              

Well, we know that ain't true!! So, stop trying to be a smarty pants!                                                                                                                                                                              

good job geinies dont exist  cos at least we all know that the above joke is just an mans fantisty   good ones bwb enjoyed readin them                                                                                                                                                                              

(trying to find the 'smug' smiley...)