The Taxman Cometh

21 Posts | Latest reply on 27/05/2010 23:53:02 by old red | Go to original / last post
Karey's Profile
Karey

In: Barnsley
Posts: 6971
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 At the end of the tax year, the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a Synagogue. While he was checking the books he turned to the Rabbi and said, 'I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?' 'Good question,' noted the Rabbi. 'We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles.' 'Oh,' replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way:  'What about all these bread-wafer purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?' 'Ah, yes,' replied the Rabbi, realising that the inspector was trying to trap him with an unanswerable question. 'We collect them and send them back to the manufacturers, and every now and then they send us a free box of bread-wafers.'  'I see,' replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Rabbi. 'Well, Rabbi,' he went on, 'what do you do with all the leftoverforeskins from the circumcisions you perform?'  'Here, too, we do not waste,' answered the Rabbi 'What we do is save all the foreskins and send them to the Tax Office, and about once a year they send us a complete dick.'                                                                                                                                                                             
Rob1050's Profile
Rob1050

In: Redditch
Posts: 748
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LOLLOLThumbs Up                                                                                                                                                                             
Brummie Jackie's Profile
Brummie Jackie

In: Hobbit HQ
Posts: 20609
82% Karma82% Karma 82% Karma82% Karma

Nice one lol                                                                                                                                                                             
skinnylady's Profile
skinnylady

In: Doncaster
Posts: 523
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

Wondered what it was when I saw the title as I work in that 'trade' - not for the taxman I hasten to add!! LOL                                                                                                                                                                             
DG99's Profile
DG99

In: Nottingham
Posts: 287
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

Are you a Rabbi?                                                                                                                                                                              
skinnylady's Profile
skinnylady

In: Doncaster
Posts: 523
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

LOL - no accountant. The photo's the weekend look Big smile                                                                                                                                                                              
DG99's Profile
DG99

In: Nottingham
Posts: 287
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

A damn fine look too Thumbs Up                                                                                                                                                                              
yamahama's Profile
yamahama

In: leicestershire
Posts: 1606
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

Wondered what it was when I saw the title as I work in that 'trade' - not for the taxman I hasten to add!!
LOL

thought you did the ops for a momentWink
                                                                                                                                                                             
skinnylady's Profile
skinnylady

In: Doncaster
Posts: 523
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

LOL  Perhaps I should have kept quiet in the first place LOL                                                                                                                                                                             
rockchick123's Profile
rockchick123

In: Manchester
Posts: 3376
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LOL @ Carey LOL                                                                                                                                                                              
whiteairedfox's Profile
whiteairedfox

In: liverpool
Posts: 857
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i so do agree,if they had brains we would be introuble,absolute gobshites,was asked wether my 5yr ld gambled on line,my answer was ,i would take his head off,from his stupid feet with my bare hands,god help us from these people                                                                                                                                                                             
smokey_1_uk's Profile
smokey_1_uk

In: Watford
Posts: 847
33% Karma33% Karma 33% Karma33% Karma

ROFL @ Skinny as a Rabbi Big smile                                                                                                                                                                              
Brummie Jackie's Profile
Brummie Jackie

In: Hobbit HQ
Posts: 20609
82% Karma82% Karma 82% Karma82% Karma

I'm not a Rabbi   but I AM SPARTACUS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!                                                                                                                                                                             
Deleted Member's Profile
Deleted Member

In: NA
Posts: 0
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

I'M SPARTICUS!!!!!!!! LOL                                                                                                                                                                             
yamahama's Profile
yamahama

In: leicestershire
Posts: 1606
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

I'M SPARTICUS!!!!!!!!                                                                                                                                                                              
Deleted User's Profile
Deleted User

In: NA
Posts: 6852
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

NO I'M SPARTICUS!!!

Sorry had a middle of the night rally moment LOL                                                                                                                                                                             
willow's Profile
willow

In: Tyldesley
Posts: 308
1% Karma1% Karma 1% Karma1% Karma

who's sparticus??? thought your name was shell?? eh shell??? lol  x                                                                                                                                                                             
yamahama's Profile
yamahama

In: leicestershire
Posts: 1606
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

it was kirk douglas                                                                                                                                                                              
old red's Profile
old red

In: Norwich
Posts: 1648
6% Karma6% Karma 6% Karma6% Karma

HAH..I,m Kirk Douglas...                                                                                                                                                                             
yamahama's Profile
yamahama

In: leicestershire
Posts: 1606
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

are you still alive then?                                                                                                                                                                              


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