Are You Having A Bad Day?

7 Posts | Latest reply on 13/12/2011 17:10:42 by Sandi | Go to original / last post
trikerider552's Profile
trikerider552

In: Reading
Posts: 314
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

THINK YOU'RE HAVING A BAD DAY?....
   
A man was working on his motorcycle on the patio, his wife nearby in the kitchen. 
While revving the engine, the motorcycle accidentally slipped into gear. 
The man, still holding onto the handlebars,
was dragged along as it burst through the glass patio doors.
His wife, hearing the crash, ran in the room to find her husband cut and bleeding,
the motorcycle, and the shattered patio door. 
She called for an ambulance and, because the house sat on a fairly large hill,
went down the several flights of stairs to meet the paramedics
and escort them to her husband.
While the attendants were loading her husband into the ambulance,
the wife managed to right the motorcycle and push it outside. 
She also quickly mopped up the spilled fuel with some paper
towels and threw them into the toilet.
After being treated and released, the man returned home,
looked at the shattered patio door and the damage done to his motorcycle. 
He went into the bathroom and consoled himself with a cigarette
while attending to his business.  About to stand, he flipped the butt between his legs.
The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her husband screaming. 
Finding him lying on the bathroom floor with his trousers blown away
and burns on his buttocks, legs and groin, she once again phoned for an ambulance. 
The same paramedic crew was dispatched.
As the paramedics carried the man down the stairs to the ambulance they asked
the wife how he had come to burn himself.  She told them. 
They started laughing so hard that one of them slipped,
dropping the stretcher and dumping the husband out. 
He fell down the remaining stairs, breaking his leg.

___________________________________________

Still think you're having a bad day?

Fire authorities in California found a corpse in a burned-out section
of forest while assessing the damage done by a forest fire. 
The deceased male was dressed in a full wet suit,
complete with scuba tanks on his back, flippers, and face mask.
A post-mortem test revealed that the man had died not from burns,
but from massive internal injuries. 
Dental records provided a positive identification. 
Investigators then set about to determine how a fully clothed
diver ended up in the middle of a forest fire.
It was revealed that, on the day of the fire,
the man went diving off the coast,
some 20 miles from the forest.  The fire fighters,
seeking to control the fire as quickly as possible,
had called in a fleet of helicopters with very large dip buckets. 
Water was dipped from the ocean and emptied at the site of the forest fire.
You guessed it.  One minute our diver was making like Flipper in the Pacific,
the next, he was doing the breast stroke in a fire dip bucket 300 feet in the air. 
Some days it just doesn't pay to get out of bed.

______________________________________________

Still having a bad day? Just remember, it could be worse...

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez
oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.  At a special ceremony,
two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back
into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers. 
A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.
_____________________________________________

Still think you are having a bad day?

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically,
almost in a dancing frenzy,
with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. 
Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current,
she whacked him with a handy broom handle, breaking his arm in two places. 
Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.
_______________________________________________

STILL think you're having a bad day?

Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty
of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn , Germany by cutting the fences. 
Suddenly, all two thousand pigs in the pens broke loose and escaped through the cut fences,
The two hopeless protesters were trampled to death in the ensuing stampede.
____________________________________________

What?! STILL having a bad day??

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb.
It came back with "return to sender" stamped on it. 
Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.

There now, feeling better?
Nutkin68's Profile
Nutkin68

In: Hull
Posts: 4203
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

where do you find them?! sheer brilliance LOL                                                                                                                                                                             
Boodyblues's Profile
Boodyblues

In: york
Posts: 1153
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

i think trikerider watches mythbusters?                                                                                                                                                                             
drobess's Profile
drobess

In: Bedworth
Posts: 2473
19% Karma19% Karma 19% Karma19% Karma

very gud trikester, I must remember never to go scuba divingLOL                                                                                                                                                                             
rockchick123's Profile
rockchick123

In: Manchester
Posts: 3376
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

lol ... erm ... not having one now! lol                                                                                                                                                                             
Deleted Member's Profile
Deleted Member

In: NA
Posts: 0
0% Karma0% Karma 0% Karma0% Karma

Everything is just dandy at the moment thanks, Could do with another 3 motorbikes though.                                                                                                                                                                             
Sandi's Profile
Sandi

In: Huddersfield, W
Posts: 17942
68% Karma68% Karma 68% Karma68% Karma

  I was just feeling sorry for myself cos my telly has conked, sound but no picture, so I thought I'd watch telly on the internet, bugger me the same thing happened there too, I read this thread again and PML LOL                                                                                                                                                                              


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