One day a man decides to retire

4 Posts | Latest replyΒ on 08/08/2020 11:33:45 by jinx57 | Go to original / last post
Lindsay's Profile
Lindsay

In: Leeds
Posts: 15125
54% Karma54% Karma 54% Karma54% Karma

He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life, that is, until the ship sank.

He soon finds himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing, only bananas and coconuts.

After about four months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he has ever seen rows up to the shore.

In disbelief, he asks, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?"

She replies, "I rowed over from the other side of the island where I landed when my fishing boat sank." "Amazing," he notes. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you."

"Oh, this ole thing?" explains the woman. " I made the boat out of some raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled from gum tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm tree branches, and the sides and stern came from an Eucalyptus tree."

"But, where did you get the tools?"

"Oh, that was no problem," replied the woman. " On the south side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain temperature in a volcanic vent I found just down island, it melted into ductile iron and I used that to make tools and used the tools to make the hardware."

The guy is stunned.

"Let's row over to my place," she says "and I'll give you a tour." So, after a short time of rowing, she soon docks the boat at a small hand built wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a long stone walk leading to a cabin and tree house.

While the woman ties up the rowboat with an expertly woven hemp rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house, she says casually, It's not much, but I call it home.

Please sit down." "Would you like a drink?"

"No! No thank you," the man blurts out, still dazed. "I can't take another drop of coconut juice."

"Oh, it's not coconut juice," winks the woman. "I have a still. How would you like a Jack Daniels neat?" Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepts, and they sit down on her couch to talk. After they exchange their individual survival stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you like to take a shower and shave? There's a razor in the bathroom cabinet upstairs."

No longer questioning anything, the man goes upstairs into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet is a razor made from a piece of tortoise bone. Two shells honed to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end inside a swivel mechanism.

"This woman is amazing," he muses. "What's next?"

When he returns, she greets him wearing nothing but a bandana around her blonde locks and some small flowers on tiny vines, each strategically positioned. She smelled faintly of coconut oil. She then beckons for him to sit down next to her.

"Tell me," she begins suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've both been out here for many months. You must have been lonely. When was the last time you had a really good ride?"

She stares into his eyes.
He can't believe what he's hearing.

"You mean..." he swallows excitedly as tears start to form in his eyes,

"You've built a Motorcycle?”

Thanks to DucatiPS for trying to post in chat... Way too long!πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ˜
Mister Pete - Optimist's Profile
Mister Pete - Optimi

In: Burntwood
Posts: 114
8% Karma8% Karma 8% Karma8% Karma

Nice one Lindsay - but yes way too long as I burnt my soup reading through it lol                                                                                                                                                                             
Nightowl45's Profile
Nightowl45

In: Stoke on Trent
Posts: 2
46% Karma46% Karma 46% Karma46% Karma

😁 like it                                                                                                                                                                             
jinx57's Profile
jinx57

In: Leonard Stanley
Posts: 28149
26% Karma26% Karma 26% Karma26% Karma

Nothing ever washes up on my beach except plastic bottles(no messages)...πŸ˜”πŸŒžπŸŒ΄                                                                                                                                                                             


Remove these advertisements                  Advertise Here
Biker Match is a UK social, events and dating website by bikers, for bikers.  All British motorcyclists are welcome to join our large and exciting community free of charge in search of ride-outs, motorcycling events & rallies, biker dating & relationships, motorcycle help, motorcycle forums, biking news, racing news, motorcycle classifieds or just to get to know other UK bikers.  Create your profile and upload your photos now completely free.
Website copyright 2002-2024 www.bikermatch.co.uk.

Page generated in 0.1401 seconds. There are 356 users online now.

Site tested and secured by Comodo HackerGuardian       Site tested and approved by McAfee SiteAdvisor      Site PCI DSS security approved      Site tested and secured by Comodo HackerProof       Site secured and validated using highest 2048bit encryption