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Clever Insults

37 Posts | Latest reply on 19/12/2014 20:56:05 by Tonka64 | Go to original / last post

37 posts found over 2 pages. Page:

Deleted Member

In: NA
Posts: 0

Interviewer: 'So Frank, you have long hair. Does that make you a woman?'Frank Zappa: 'You have a wooden leg. Does that make you a table?'

Message posted by Deleted Member on 06 October 2014 at 21:18

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Deleted Member @ 06/10/2014 21:18:21

Deleted Member

In: NA
Posts: 0

"I've gradually developed an attachment for you. It fits over your mouth."

Message posted by Deleted Member on 09 October 2014 at 19:54

Deleted Member @ 09/10/2014 19:54:05

Deleted Member

In: NA
Posts: 0

David Frost, on Pia Zadora portraying Anne Frank: "She was so bad that when the Gestapo burst in at the end, the audience shouted 'She's in the attic'."

Message posted by Deleted Member on 12 November 2014 at 20:15

Deleted Member @ 12/11/2014 20:15:30

Joey05

In: Preston
Posts: 3720

Winston Churchill:

" A modest little person, with much to be modest about"

Message posted by Joey05 on 14 November 2014 at 07:28

Joey05 @ 14/11/2014 07:28:45

Twokan

In: Birmingham
Posts: 25

James May - "I can't dumb it down to your level because I am afraid of heights!"

A colleague, upon learning my age - "Your paper route must've been all up hill"

Message posted by Twokan on 17 November 2014 at 21:45

Twokan @ 17/11/2014 21:45:59

Joey05

In: Preston
Posts: 3720

I could never learn to like her except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight!! Mark Twain

Message posted by Joey05 on 18 November 2014 at 05:56

Joey05 @ 18/11/2014 05:56:08

davidneale

In: London
Posts: 25650

Lady Astor to Churchill: “Winston, if you were my husband I would flavour your coffee with poison”

Churchill: “Madam, if I were your husband, I should drink it.”

Message posted by davidneale on 01 December 2014 at 00:19

davidneale @ 01/12/2014 00:19:57

Joey05

In: Preston
Posts: 3720

If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.—Catherine the Great

Message posted by Joey05 on 02 December 2014 at 07:11

Joey05 @ 02/12/2014 07:11:39

Ragnar

In: London
Posts: 35069

A woman is only a woman.

But a good cigar is a smoke.

Rudyard Kipling

Whatever women do they must do it twice as well as men to be thought half as good.

Luckily, this is not difficult.

Charlotte Whitton

Message posted by Ragnar on 02 December 2014 at 11:32

Ragnar @ 02/12/2014 11:32:11

Joey05

In: Preston
Posts: 3720

* “"What problems do you have, apart from being blind, unemployed and a moron?" John McEnroe to Wimbledon spectator

* “I’ve met serial killers and assassins but nobody scared me as much as Mrs Thatcher.” Ken Livingstone

Message posted by Joey05 on 03 December 2014 at 07:01

Joey05 @ 03/12/2014 07:01:07

Ragnar

In: London
Posts: 35069

Never trust a man with short legs,

Brains too near their bottoms.

Noel Coward

Message posted by Ragnar on 04 December 2014 at 22:55

Ragnar @ 04/12/2014 22:55:23

Joey05

In: Preston
Posts: 3720

Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them.
Bruce Lee

Message posted by Joey05 on 05 December 2014 at 05:54

Joey05 @ 05/12/2014 05:54:47

Tonka64

In: Norfolk
Posts: 158

Germans are flummoxed by humor, the Swiss have no concept of fun, the Spanish think there is nothing at all ridiculous about eating dinner at midnight, and the Italians should never, ever have been let in on the invention of the motor car. - - - Bill Bryson

Message posted by Tonka64 on 08 December 2014 at 21:14

Tonka64 @ 08/12/2014 21:14:41

Tonka64

In: Norfolk
Posts: 158

I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home. - - - Groucho Marx

Message posted by Tonka64 on 08 December 2014 at 21:29

Tonka64 @ 08/12/2014 21:29:48

dustin666

In: carlisle
Posts: 1275

Women whom wish to be equal to men ;lack ambition,,,,,,,

Marilyn Monroe.

Message posted by dustin666 on 08 December 2014 at 21:32

dustin666 @ 08/12/2014 21:32:59

Tonka64

In: Norfolk
Posts: 158

" She's the sort of woman who lives for others ---You can tell by the others by their haunted expression "
C.S.Lewis

Message posted by Tonka64 on 19 December 2014 at 20:51

Tonka64 @ 19/12/2014 20:51:50

Tonka64

In: Norfolk
Posts: 158

* “"The only time my wife and I had a simultaneous orgasm was when the judge signed the divorce papers" Woody Allen

Message posted by Tonka64 on 19 December 2014 at 20:56

Tonka64 @ 19/12/2014 20:56:05

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