how to help my bro who just witnessed his best buds death

14 Posts | Latest reply on 02/05/2007 12:22:17 by guinivere | Go to original / last post
guinivere's Profile
guinivere

In: manchester
Posts: 3
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Does anyone have any idea how I can help my brother? He just witnessed his best buddy get killed this afternoon on his bike. He is devastated but not letting it out. He has been depressed before,should I leave him or try to get him to talk? I know this is a sad subject but any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks 
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gsrider

In: peterborough
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just being there for him will help knowing he can open up to you if he wants or needs to........sorry to hear about this send condolences on cheers                                                                                                                                                                             
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Di

In: Wellingborough
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You can't make him talk if he doesn't want to so just make sure you are there for him if he needs you. Give him my condolances and it's gonna take time for him to get over this. xx                                                                                                                                                                             
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Sexysmirnoff

In: Dudley
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he prob still in shock hun giv him tym to open up about it , yes keep a close eye on him but giv him a cuple days to see if he lets it out hes prob numb at mo x                                                                                                                                                                             
Sandi's Profile
Sandi

In: Huddersfield, W
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What did the staff say at the hospital, I assume your brother was treated for shock yea? Did they offer him any counselling? How did he deal with his depression before? Is he likely to harm himself because of his grief? Only you can answer those questions but in general I'd repeat what gs Diane and B P have said, probably all you can do is give him time and be there for him.   Loads of hugs (if he'll let you) most folk love being hugged, and don't really need us to do, or say, anything but be there for us and listen when we need them to.                                                                                                                                                                                  
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red star

In: Bridport
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from my own experience after my daughter was killed, having family and friends around me helped, knowing that someone was there for me when I needed them.be strong it takes time. wish i could be with you to give you both a hug, with love Red Star x                                                                                                                                                                              
storm's Profile
storm

In: derbyshire
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be aware also that some suffer from survivor guilt too, and that can bring a deep depressive state about, give him space to be with his own thoughts be there when he needs you, if your worried about him then you could perhaps see a grief counsellor on how to be supportive for him. and all of the above.  sending thoughts and prayers out to all who were involved or witnessed this tragic loss xxx   red star (((((((((((((peace)))))))))))))))                                                                                                                                                                             
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Deleted Member

In: NA
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Really sorry to hear it Guinivere,good advice given already,time and patience.My condolences,x.                                                                                                                                                                             
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witchiest

In: hinckley
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all of the above hun. time,hand holding,hugs,tissues,tea,but mainly just that he knows u are there and that u always will be. my thoughts are with u both. xxx                                                                                                                                                                             
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kawasaki zx-6r

In: BURNHAM-ON-SEA,S
Posts: 4
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hi.   i have been in the same situation this year,my mate was killed on the 18th febuary,just be there for him,and when he does let it all out,help him all you can,tell him to  remember the good times etc,but it will take him a long time t get over it,all i can say really,                                                                                                                                                                             
storm's Profile
storm

In: derbyshire
Posts: 2326
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awwwww thoughts with you kawasaki zx 6r   xxxxx                                                                                                                                                                             
millsy's Profile
millsy

In: coleshill
Posts: 136
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oh my thats a terriable thing for your bro to witness hun,and obviously your very worried, if his a teenager then he will probably spend some time with his mates who are also in shock and grieving or he may just sit up in his room for a while..there are different stages of grieving so it will come out in his own time when he is ready..i wouldnt push the issue personally but let him know your there for him and just lots of hugs really...its gonna be along road a head of him but reasurre him there is light at the end of the tunnel even though he will wont feel it at the momment..my condolences to you all because it affects everyone family and friends best wishes millsy xx
millsy's Profile
millsy

In: coleshill
Posts: 136
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kawasaki zx-6r Hug xxx....time passes so slowly when you lose a loved one so your a couple of months down the line now ,but it probably only seems a couple of weeks ...millsy xx
guinivere's Profile
guinivere

In: manchester
Posts: 3
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Thank you to everyone who took the time to reply. Your thoughts and prayers have been a huge help. The biker pub my brother and his friend go to are holding fundraisers to help his son and this is helping too. Many thanks, Guinivere xxx                                                                                                                                                                             


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