: Notice to ALL Employees   Dear employees,Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of theeconomy, the Management has decided to implement a scheme to putworkers of 40 years of age and above on early retirement.This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early). Personsselected to be RAPED can apply to management to be eligible for theSHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination).Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under theSCREW programme (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers). A person maybe RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Managementdeems appropriate.Persons who have been RAPED can only get AIDS (Additional Income forDependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired PersonnelEarly Severance).Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED orSCREWED any further by Management.Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as muchSxxT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Management hasalways prided itself on the amount of SxxT it gives employees.Should you feel that you do not receive enough SxxT, please bring tothe attention of your Supervisor. They have been trained to give youall the SxxT you can handle.Sincerely,The Management                                                                                                                                                                             

  As old as it is it still makes me <g>   (<g> = giggle)                                                                                                                                                                             

Ohh i just got it  never mind i keep trying                                                                                                                                                                              

you would sign up for that one an all vent pmsl                                                                                                                                                                              

  Aww I wasn't critici/ critisi/ havin a go. I've been using the internet for 11 yrs and a lot of jokes/funnies were around then, some are rearranged/edited and some like this one are as funny today as they were then.                                                                                                                                                                                

Haha thats ok  i been around a while too. Yep some say to long (best get that in first lol)   The good old ones are still the best.                                                                                                                                                                              

The good old ones are still the best.   And always will be Vent                                                                                                                                                                              

i must be a young en lol....i aint heard this 1 b4....but it still made me chuckle..nice 1 vent