THREE WOMEN, TWO YOUNGER, AND ONE SENIOR CITIZEN, WERE SITTING NAKED IN A SAUNA. SUDDENLY THERE WAS A BEEPING SOUND. THE YOUNG WOMAN PRESSED HER FOREARM AND THE BEEP STOPPED. THE OTHERS LOOKED AT HER QUESTIONINGLY. 'THAT WAS MY PAGER,' SHE SAID. I HAVE A MICROCHIP UNDER THE SKIN OF MY ARM.   A FEW MINUTES LATER, A PHONE RANG. THE SECOND YOUNG WOMAN LIFTED HER PALM TO HER EAR. WHEN SHE FINISHED, SHE EXPLAINED, 'THAT WAS MY MOBILE PHONE. I HAVE A MICROCHIP IN MY HAND.' THE OLDER WOMAN FELT VERY LOW -TECH. NOT TO BE OUT DONE, SHE DECIDED SHE HAD TO DO SOMETHING JUST AS IMPRESSIVE. SHE STEPPED OUT OF THE SAUNA AND WENT TO THE BATHROOM. SHE RETURNED WITH A PIECE OF TOILET PAPER HANGING FROM HER REAR END. THE OTHERS RAISED THEIR EYEBROWS AND STARED AT HER. THE OLDER WOMAN FINALLY SAID.........WELL, WILL YOU LOOK AT THAT....I'M GETTING A FAX!!                                                                                                                                                                                 

Wozthis....homework?                                                                                                                                                                              

yeh...   Been outta the office most of the day !  lol                                                                                                                                                                             

two eggs in a pan and one says
 "i've a huge crack"
the other replies
"stop teasing me I'm not f*****g hard yet!

             well it amused me!
                                                                                                                                                                             

                                                                                                                                                                             

Husband and wife have a code word for when they want sex - whashing machine - layed in bed one night the husband say "washing machine", the wife says not tonight and rolls over.  After a few minutes, feeling guilty the wife turns over and says ok, the husband says too late, it was only a small load, i did it by hand