As some of you may be aware. I underwent surgury a week ago and the result is that i now own a new hip joint. It's all going tickety boo so far. Thanks for asking.  But the problem i've got is that i'm now off work for 6 weeks and stuck in the house. Its already driving me nuts!! I was wondering how all you long termers cope as i dont even have the excitement of trudging up to the dole office every week. And i'm not prepared to smoke vast amounts of weed to pass the time. So, any advise would be helpfull. It doesn't even have to be legal.                                                                                                                                                                             

I'd be making jewellery, reading the piles & piles of books I've borrowed over the last 12 months and not got round to reading yet, watching the dvds I've bought/borrowed and not got round to watching yet... erm... then on day 2, hell, I might even dust the old guitars off and see if I can learn how to play again!

;o)

Or wandering around t'interweb causing mayhem wherever I go - that's always good for a giggle... find a lively forum and play the devil's advocate, whatever they're arguing about - just take the opposite side and be *really* extreme... wind them all up so they all start arguing with each other and sit there laughing at them :o)

Ye gads... How sad am I?! Hehehe!

Research your family history? If you can't find anything interesting, make it up and wind up the rest of your family by regaling them with tales of mass-murderers?

Erm... Make a matchstick replica of your bike?

I think I'm probably scraping the bottom of the barrel now...

1/. Perv over the latest Honda Deauville catalogue - I do   2/. YOU HAVE THE INTERNET FFS!!!! If this isn't the ultimate source and resource for every imaginable persuasion of sexual gratification, I don't know what is. You can download anything off it - I do   3/. Take up the noble pasttime of Hobbyist Lockpicking. You can buy the basic tools for about £20 (+24 hour delivery) and get picking straight away. There are loads of different locks everywhere and it's a practical skill. I do   4/. Swamp my girlfriend with long, rambling emails about whatever is going on in your head at the time. I do   5/. Learn card tricks, both magical "pick a card, any card" types and also the game ones, like one-handed cutting, second, third and bottom dealing, stacking and so on. I don't do this one...   6/. Read the latest series of books by Kelley Armstrong. I do   7/. Type a list like this and finish every applicable paragraph with "I do "..... I do   8/. Play on-line games. Either the gambling type where you can win money, or teh video game types with cute, fluffy animals that explode when they fall off platforms. I do   9/. Plan the next BM gathering/meet-up. Please make it fairly near Reading, though!!!   10/. I could send you my work and you could do that to keep you occupied. You could happily spend hours watching a camera going up a sewer pipe for a living. I do                                                                                                                                                                              

Or wandering around t'interweb causing mayhem wherever I go - that's always good for a giggle... find a lively forum and play the devil's advocate, whatever they're arguing about - just take the opposite side and be *really* extreme... wind them all up so they all start arguing with each other and sit there laughing at them :o)   Of couse, a good girl like you would never do that Blues, how long before you're allowed out in the car, either as driver or passenger? Not being in Brum I can't pop round and give you a lift/take you for a pint/whatever, but when you're OK to do that then surely someone can rally round.                                                                                                                                                                              

well least youll have strong right wrist! even better if your ambidextrous! good for when back on the bike!!                                                                                                                                                                             

isn't it funny how all the suggestions have been mature, sensible and well thought out    I expected nothing less.   get well soon mate!                                                                                                                                                                             

wills was very mature an thoughtfull ! [whats he after?]                                                                                                                                                                             

Thanks for all the input everyone.  over the next few weeks i will endevour to try/test a few of the suggestions. I'm not sure about trawling t'internet for sexual gratification though. I dont want to end up with RSI and be of for longer.                                                                                                                                                                              

Blues now I have seen you get in and out of a car and manage a journey I could always come over and pick you up before I go to work and you could sit down at mine and do my ironing, or paint a few rooms.   Wills,  blues is able to get in and out of a car, infact I went over on Tuesday night and took him for a meal and a beer. Sorry blues if I bored you with driving you all around where I used to live but even if you didn't enjoy it I loved going back in time. Strange how two big families in one village with similar age children used the same places yet none of our paths crossed.                                                                                                                                                                             

Personally I'd be training for the extreme masturbation event for the 2012 london olympics..........start off gentle by watching filth in me pants and eating cheesy wotsits. By the time the games are on I should have progressed to a level of wankerism to rival the prime minister or ken livingstone.   Or I'd be thinking up new TV formats, my current fave is pro celebrity masturbation........Tarby,Forsythe,Ronnie Corbett and Terry Wogan tugging away over a selection of one handed jazz pamphlets ( thats razz mags to the uninitiated) while regailing us with witty stories from thier show biz days.........Last one to bust his nut wins £50 for the charity of their choice...............Its a winner I'm telling ya!                                                                                                                                                                             

crochet                                                                                                                                                                             

Ghosty, think of the poor bloke's eyesight   WB Earthwind                                                                                                                                                                             

Umm so now I know wills why blues walking stick is white not the usual just plain wooden colour and theres him telling me it was because of his height it was the only one in stock at the hospital that fitted him.   Wills shame blues couldn't have put his energies into finding your keys for you, glad I was able to help, I just went through all the DIPPY places I have found mine before.                                                                                                                                                                              

lol thanks hi wills lovely weather,

painting is a good peacful pastime or drawing do miniyures then you dont have to move very much

                                                                                                                                                                             

minitures i mean spelling still atrocious                                                                                                                                                                              

I just went through all the DIPPY places I have found mine before.   Takes one to know one, I suppose                                                                                                                                                                             

By the time the games are on I should have progressed to a level of wankerism to rival the prime minister or ken livingstone.

Be reasonable GH - it's only 4 years away! I know you gotta aim high, but realistic goals eh? ;o)                                                                                                                                                                             

Blues - You can always play guitar hero 3 lol                                                                                                                                                                             

Ghosty, think of the poor bloke's eyesight   What for? Without that, he can happily justify spending his life feeling his way around at parties!!!!!!!!                                                                                                                                                                             

Again, i thank you all for your input. Ghosty, my eye sight is already bad. so crackin one off every 5 mins isnt a really good idea. Luckily my Xbox 360 has arrived back from microsoft. It's safer if i stick to playin games and watching movies. Skins you know i'm sh#t at air guitar. you've seen my foo fighters impression and i've tried the demo on xbox.