Dear Technical Support,

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off.

To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and Playboy 6.9. Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better.

I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks. Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.

I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2005.

Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge. These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is. Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly, requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Saab93 Convertible hard drive, it often crashes. Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which can't be turned off.

Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2005, but I've been told there could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2005, it tends to delete all of your Money before uninstalling itself.

Any advice would be helpful, many thanks.

Dear Sir,
In response to a letter you received from an acquaintance of mine, I must relate further problems with products I have obtained from you.

Wife 1.0 was eventually corrupted by Slapper 2.1 and was unresponsive to remedial attempts and whilst most of the problems were happening in the background, I was unfortunate enough to have work interrupted by the discovery of an active violation of fidelity protocols. Mother-in-law 1.0 Gold, which is an up grade of MotherInLaw and supposedly incorruptible, automatically backed up and added to the problems caused by the initial Slapper 2.1 infection.
Free add-ons, Stepson1.0 and Stepdaughter 1.3,were constantly problematic once Wife 1.0 was initiated and Stepdaughter 1.1 and 1.2, which were malware lurking in the programme, infected the system regularly causing intermittent shutdowns of scheduled actions.
My only course of action was to walk away after initiating a shutdown and consigning the whole hardware package to the Junk bin.

After many years of satisfactory Girlfriend 1.0 service, with the obligatory and extremely fun interchangeable package, my recent experience has led me to decide not to use your relationship products in the future. DrinkingMates 4.2 has never let me down, with the occasional bad sector which was usually fixed by switching off and on again. When this action was unsuccessful, a thump to the hardware usually made it work the way I anticipated.

Hopefully this feedback will be of use to your R&D dept.

Yours Sincerely...…….Mr Hugh Jampton.

Oh you guys! 🤔🙄😂🤣😂                                                                                                                                                                             

Dear Tech Support

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slowdown in the overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

Please advise asap.

**Courtesy of the magical mystical Google Search* 👍🏻

Pass